US Weekly No.1: Time to Look at More Assholes
You wrote in Meaty that you’re glad Lena Dunham didn’t write a black character in the first season of Girls “because when you’re black, it’s your reflexive response to monitor black people in white Hollywood, just in case some jagoff writer is trying to slip some casual racism past your ass.” You also list several shows with no diversity in their casts that haven’t been criticized for it as widely as Girls has. Why do you think that particular show raises so much ire?
Because Lena Dunham is a 27-year-old woman getting to do whatever the hell she wants with big-time HBO money and exposure. Everyone is obsessed with her, and I think what she’s doing is incredible. I think a lot of criticism stems from, one, jealousy, especially since everyone everywhere is so goddamn entitled all the time. People are mad because she’s young and hasn’t paid her dues or whatever, not because her show is unwatchable trash. She didn’t have to spend 20 years working her way up from the mailroom. So what? She is young and female and accomplishing amazing things, so I’m going to get behind that. I would never want to be that bitter asshole sitting around pissed off because some kid succeeded where I haven’t. Good for her. I hope she makes a dozen shows.
And two, people are salty because she has the nerve to be unconventionally attractive and show her real-woman boobs on TV while also pretending to bang super-hot dudes. “The nerve of her to have a belly during prime time!” That is the dream of my life, to have Christian Bale or someone equally handsome spreading open my thighbacks to give it to me dirty. You wouldn’t want to see The Samantha Irby Show. Every episode would be some hot piece of beef holding up my stomach while going down on me for 27 consecutive minutes. Believe that.